the toilet

thank you Cooper for the $200 plumbing bill to pull out the plastic sand-art bottle you stuffed down the toilet. we love you!!!!

march madness

no, not as in college basketball ;)

so this month we decided to make a move, literally, on some of the changes we've been kicking around the Edwards homestead. at the end of february, we gave notice to the 3/2 house we've been renting for the last 18mos. and downsized to a 2/2 condo just 2 streets away. staying within the vicinity ensured that Jonah wouldn't have to switch schools. so now we're adjusting to the suprisingly spacious quarters of 'apartment living' again. the boys are sharing a room and while we're still getting used to the giggling at bed time, it's exciting to see their relationship with each other take a new direction.

one might wonder why this new change. well, after many discussions between me and craig and us feeling like we don't really have a whole lot going for us here, that we couldn't do someplace else, we've mentally committed (at this point) to moving far far away. ok, just to Paso Robles =) why Paso? i think subliminally because i have family there. but in all honesty i just happened upon that city as i was browsing California for other comparable places to live. it's exciting to dream like that, even though we know this move won't happen as soon as we'd like it. i've got my dad's lifestyle to contend with first and foremost, as well as it's just not feasable to up and move away, what with all the costs doing something like that requires. so until then we decided to save ourselves about $400/mo. in rent, clean ourselves up financially and make a more solidified plan. one that doesn't require my willingness to live out of a motel, working as a housekeeper!... ah, desperation at it's finest! =)~

i have no pictures to share because also in march, our pc caught a virus and is non-operational at this time. boohoo. but in kid related news, the boys are adjusting well in the new place and i can see how they are growing closer. Cooper however, continues to struggle with the dynamics of everyday life. we found him IN the oven the other morning and he can't seem to stay away from other un-kid friendly things, the burners on the stove, the dishwasher knobs, the toilet, the toilet paper, the toilet paper roll in the toilet, the wet toilet paper ALL over the bathroom (reminiscent of spit balls anyone!?), you get the point. yet he's able to sit with someone for say 30min., reading books! go figure. we've determined the poor kid just needs to be continually engaged in something. and fortunately that 6yr. age gap makes Jonah an extremely understandable and helpful big brother!

school wise, i decided to put off the bigger goal of obtaining my bachelors and instead am starting even smaller with the human services (social work) certificate program. i figure that way, i can put off math for even longer (i did mention i HATE math, right!? ;) and increase my chances of finding a job that i like doing while continuing towards that shiny B and brilliant M in the sky! hehe.

lots to ponder

so the last couple weeks have been a bit whirlwind-ish. in the midst of our little family of 4 wishing and dreaming to make some exciting changes, toying around and finding ourselves consumed with all our ideas... my dad lands in the hospital a very sick guy.

Last week my mom took him to the ER in a very sick state and he was determined to have pneumonia and diabetic ketoacidosis. now considering my dad had not even been diagnosed with diabetes yet, this is not a good way to find out. his blood sugar was at 400 and they began a heavy regimin of insulin. meanwhile he remained dillusional and slept quite a bit for the first 3 days. because of the diabetic state, he will require insulin therapy for several weeks after he's discharged and will hopefully be able to maintain the disease by diet alone. i'm not optimistic on that last part. my dad already cannot understand why he can't have kool-aid and donuts and pie and ice cream and burgers and fries... the list goes on! he got himself into quite a few crappy eating habits this last 30yrs! so because of the brain damage and his inability to remember these new and very important details, it is being recommended that he receive a higher level of care so that his diet and medication can be monitored. So he remains in the hospital until his blood sugar can be regulated and more tests continue to be performed. the way i saw it and which seems to be proving itself, is that with the little information that was handed to me when i took over, we really are starting from scratch. diseases of the blood, immune system, heart... everything is being looked into further. and Case Managers are working their magic to find a place that will accept his modest form of payment: medicare and medi-cal. so his story is still being written and we have yet to know the ultimate outcome of it all. it is very helpful to have a support system (for both me and my dad).. my mom has been an exceptional asset along with 2 of my uncles who live locally who are also doing and offering anything they can.

and as of saturday, my dad is pretty 'deceivingly' healthy. he's back to his old self, hollering at neighboring patients to turn their tv's down, calling me with his lists of things he thinks he needs (all things that have nothing to do with his stay in the hospital) and even returning to his sleepwalking ways... lastnight he got up to use the bathroom, walked out of his new room (that he now shares- UH-OH), proceeded into the adjoining patient room and peed on the floor! so thankfully the staff saw the need and have provided a 1 on 1 aid that has been spending the majority of her time, by his side.

... until next time. i'm sure i'll plenty more exciting things to share! =

What if...

... you talked about it since the beginning but thought it was too far fetched to grasp?
what if fear and complacency has been replaced with drive and ambition?
what if the challenge was actually the reward itself?

... i'm just sayin'.

thickle thursday

k, i don't know yet what 'thickle' means or if it's a word, but i've determined that's the kind of day i'm having... it ryhms with 'fickle', which i still don't think is the right word, but i'm forcing it into appropriateness for today anyway... it sounds like pickle and sick and ick!

the day sorta trickled over from yesterday when as i was headed out the door for the day with kids, i hear cooper cry-whining (NOTHING unusual) and discover he's puked his milk all over himself. so i send jonah across the street to catch a ride to school with his cousins and i clean cooper up and call the appropriate people. craig was able to come home and stay with coop and i left for work. but still only an hour into my day, craig was a bit concerned because cooper hadn't stopped throwing up, he had nothing more to throw up and was now dry-heaving. so i head home with all the necessary 'juices' to baby my baby. he carried on until 2pm, throwing up every 30min- hour until he was finally able to rest for a nap. now i remember jonah being pukey sick, but never this bad. and with cooper's sensibility that he can command things of this world to simply be or not be- (gravity or really any other laws of nature that he's continually frustrated at not being able to control as he wishes), chasing my wild 2yo around with a large kitchen pot, trying to hold him up to it like a limp doll, all the while he's screaming 'NO, not yet'.. really made for an exhausting day!

and plug in 'dad' who calls me about a mysterious check that's showed up at his house. since he couldn't figure out how to tell me what he was looking at, i went over there only to discover it's a check that i wrote for his newpaper subscription that's been tacked to the bulletin board for over a month. it's for the paper boy. aauugh.

so moving on to today, cooper seems to be back to his full throttle self and i come to work ready to plug away- only for my boss to share a 'funny' that happened after he notified the other staff of my absence from work yesterday. one of my in-direct co-workers replied to my boss, suggesting that he never hire my kids since they're always so sick!! @*&^#**$ how dare he!?? needless to say, i was a taken aback but was able to reply with a chuckle. however, it completely ruined my mood for the day and the progress i felt i was making in keeping a good, positive attitude about my working situation... even though i'm going absolutely nuts! so because i am angela hear me roar- i decided to politely and respectfully communicate to this co-worker to please consider other people's lives and situations before making such observations. i found that i was genuinly offended, given all the other issues i currently have with work.

i'm hitting up monster.com tonight!

here we are!

i don't think we have a family picture! so this is what we come up with instead

... and the boys. gosh, seeing them side by side really shows off their different features. i think the eyes say it, Jonah's are sweet and demure and Cooper's are wide and ready! yup.. that sums it up

and Mikey, the cat. he's not as mean as he looks- he's a lover not a fighter! his girl Lucy didn't make the blogger cut this time but you'll meet her later.

i don't have much update on the kiddos, except that cooper will be switching daycare soon. his current sitter, Roxanne is due for a c-section at the end of Feb. and along with that, i need someone closer to our side of town, etc. i took his moment of mild rage, as we left the interview and walk-through of Julie's daycare, as a sign that he's going to like it!

and my school update is that i'm bailing on my math class. not completely, but kinda. since my last passing grade in math was 13yrs ago and my attempts between then and now have been fruitless, i've decided to re-take the class i barely passed so that i can refresh myself and be better prepared to move forward. fortunately, the class is with the same teacher, same book, same time- but different day. so the last minute switcharoo was fairly easy. i swear i'm reliving the recurring bad dream i've had since high school math though! i'm haunted by the fact that i blew it off towards the end of my senior year and never 'finished' the class. so it's time to suck it up and get it done! argh.

i know what i want to be when i grow up!

so i mentioned my A in english. (did i also mention how stoked i was and still kinda am over this!?) before i carry on, i wanted to give a little background.

i've been a secretary pretty much my whole professional 'career'. and while i've been a darn good one, i've increasingly found myself bored with my various positions (fortunate for me, i work in a hospital where clerical support is needed all over, so i've been able to transfer within departments as positions have opened up). Well about a year ago as i was trying to determine why i was so unhappy and bored, i happened to walk pass a co-worker in an adjoining department as he was tinkering away on a pc that looked completely gutted. i thought to myself, wow- that's something you might find any given person doing at home- i bet he really enjoys this. and it occurred to me that i should also be doing something i really like. so in a semi-desperate effort for quick guidance (i'm all about immediate gratification!), i did one of those online job personality quizzes. while the results amused me a little (police officer!?), i was also determined to be possibly a good fit in the social worker arena. hmmmm. if you know me, you know that i usually love handing out my 2cents of advice in any given situation, even unfortunately in times when it wasn't asked for. i like to think of myself as a bit of a fixer or problem solver. at any rate, i finally (and kinda) have decided what i want to be when i grow up! i say this because i know what i don't want to do, and that is to be some mindless clerk working for the county, or working with terribly troubled children (mildly troubled- i might be able to handle! lol). i know that i have a lot more to offer than clerical support, but at the same time i have a lot of training to do in order to perfect what i feel i can offer.

phew! soooooo all that said, my goal is to achieve my associates degree at COS (again with the sooner than later gratification- i need something to hold in my hands!). from there i plan to obtain my bachelors and maybe even my masters in human/social services/work. i've already interviewed for a social worker asst. at the hospital, but so goes my luck; we're in the middle of a flippin hiring freeze, which naturally includes the position i applied for. i just hope that my interview went well enough for the powers that be to remember me when we've 'thawed' out. it was perfect, i'd be following around the real social workers, acting as a patient advocate, making sure their various social needs are met while they're patients in the hospital, etc.

So this semester i'm taking intermed. algebra (omg, the first day scared me!) and art appreciation (which i feel i have a lot of already, so that will be a fun class). my time will come though. and until then i'm re-discovering the joys of learning. which feels a little odd for me. who'da thunk me of all people would take an interest in reading and actually finishing a novel!? turns out to be quite an adventure, that reading is! lol..